"Girl and the Blue Burqa," by D. Thomas Mooers

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"Girl and the Blue Burqa," by D. Thomas Mooers

Post by Kenwood on Thu Dec 20, 2012 6:37 am

Anyone wishing to add some thoughts about this particular story and/or author, feel free to do so here. Praise and criticism is encouraged equally, but please keep the latter on the constructive side.

BEWARE OF SPOILERS!

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Re: "Girl and the Blue Burqa," by D. Thomas Mooers

Post by steven pirie on Sat Dec 29, 2012 3:44 pm

I liked this one, too. It's sometimes too easy for us to impose a western culture even if like in this story it's portrayed as well meaning. I like the idea of lifting it and finding teeth underneath! :-)


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Re: "Girl and the Blue Burqa," by D. Thomas Mooers

Post by Mercedes on Mon Feb 25, 2013 4:38 am

I wanted this one immediately.

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Re: "Girl and the Blue Burqa," by D. Thomas Mooers

Post by kurtnewton on Mon Feb 25, 2013 1:43 pm

I would have arm wrestled you against accepting this one, M. batter

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Re: "Girl and the Blue Burqa," by D. Thomas Mooers

Post by Shiney on Mon Feb 25, 2013 6:50 pm

Really?

I dug this one a lot.


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Re: "Girl and the Blue Burqa," by D. Thomas Mooers

Post by kurtnewton on Mon Feb 25, 2013 7:10 pm

Shiney wrote:Really?

I dug this one a lot.


Of course you liked it, John. If you didn't you would have had to arm wrestle Ken!

The plot just didn't do it for me. It seemed to me the author could have really made a genuine statement here. Instead it was turned into a horror gag. It was a very good story up until that point. Sad

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Re: "Girl and the Blue Burqa," by D. Thomas Mooers

Post by Shiney on Mon Feb 25, 2013 7:13 pm

I don't think I would have....I think this was another one we all rallied around and then Ken read it.

I liked the fact that the nosey neighbor had a complete situation mapped out about this "girl" and it turned out to be very and strangely wrong.

We can't all love everything though can we?

I still love you, Kurt.

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Re: "Girl and the Blue Burqa," by D. Thomas Mooers

Post by kurtnewton on Mon Feb 25, 2013 7:32 pm

gimme

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Re: "Girl and the Blue Burqa," by D. Thomas Mooers

Post by Kenwood on Mon Feb 25, 2013 7:39 pm

This one got three YES votes before I even read it. Unless something is poorly written, I'll accept it when it's got enough votes.

I've only used my Executive Veto card three times.

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Re: "Girl and the Blue Burqa," by D. Thomas Mooers

Post by LucretiaFraser on Fri Mar 01, 2013 8:35 am

I liked this one. I could imagine my 17 year-old daughter, filled with self-righteous anger, imposing her will on just about anyone... for their own good, of course. In fact, she tries ALL the time. So very believable, in that sense. I loved getting into her head, and hearing all about the WHY of her actions.

For some reason, though... I wanted her to kill the little girl by mistake, in a blaze of glory...

I was left kind of "meh" by the ending. Of course the little one turns out to be evil... right? How much more compelling if the girl next door takes off the blue burqa, and the little child/insect/alien DIES because of her interference?? Who is the monster now? No one learns anything, as it stands now...

Ah well... in any case, I did really enjoy this one, and I'm glad it made the cut.


Last edited by LucretiaFraser on Fri Mar 01, 2013 8:38 am; edited 1 time in total (Reason for editing : spelling... the usual)

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Re: "Girl and the Blue Burqa," by D. Thomas Mooers

Post by Ed on Wed Apr 17, 2013 6:44 pm

I thought it was well written, but I have to agree with Luctretia's "meh" sentiment. It's a straightforward victim story. It's a slow reveal of a situation. This is the sort of thing I could imagine as the story line in a 1950s B movie.

If I read a story like this I'm looking for an unexpected twist -- something I read and think I really wish I had written it. That, or character development, plot movement, growth. For instance, the protag kidnaps the girl, finds out the truth, then has to deal with it instead of taking the easy way out by dying. I want to see a struggle. As it was, the only piece of action was off screen. Somebody comes home and finds a puddle, so you don't even get to see the protag fight and then succumb.

Sorry, but I didn't find it satisfying at all.

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Re: "Girl and the Blue Burqa," by D. Thomas Mooers

Post by Mercedes on Wed Apr 17, 2013 7:00 pm

Oh! I had a chance to armwrestle Kurt and I missed it!

I like Lucretia's idea of the woman's interference causing harm to the little girl, but I still dig this story. I found it very telling of the way some of us live our lives basking in our own superiority.

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Re: "Girl and the Blue Burqa," by D. Thomas Mooers

Post by Ed on Thu Apr 18, 2013 4:19 am

Mercedes wrote:Oh! I had a chance to armwrestle Kurt and I missed it!

I like Lucretia's idea of the woman's interference causing harm to the little girl, but I still dig this story. I found it very telling of the way some of us live our lives basking in our own superiority.

I see what you mean, and I liked where that was going, too, but like Kurt said, I think it was an opportunity missed from that point of view as well. Up to the point of the reveal I liked it. The story also felt truncated to me -- it ended just where it was starting to get really interesting. It occurred to me that the protag should have felt the deformity through the clothes, a difference in weight, something like that, leave the thing behind. Then author could have explored the prejudice/racism aspect more by having the protag know what was next door and having to do something about it. People disappear, leaving behind gory puddles, and then you have the dramatic tension, the urgency of the mc knowing her family is in danger, with nobody believing her, and she has to take matters into her own hands with the risk of looking like the bad guy. Get the author back and tell him/her to finish it off. We want more! Smile girlfight

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Re: "Girl and the Blue Burqa," by D. Thomas Mooers

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