Random Stuff

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Re: Random Stuff

Post by Jats on Thu Aug 08, 2013 8:25 pm

...a repost then, live as it happens where I'm sure you'll have a "facebook murder/picture" something thread somewhere soon...

"...it doesn't get any better than this does it...." comments Jats seeing the news spreading around forumland like wildfire"...and from watching eight series of dexter I can confidently assess that she was hit with force right side of face left side hitting cooker/cabinet behind causing contusion and trauma, see blood trail down arm leading up. Knocked off her feet a little, socks on feet slippy floor, and then slumped down in that position, see... yes I am keeping an eye on this one now..." comments Jats with the compassion of a Nazi that chills him to the bone for a moment before adding "...also, if she was beating him then why was she holding a list or notepad of some sort..." as the chameleon goes off to investigate some more before jumping to conclusions then


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Re: Random Stuff

Post by Mercedes on Tue Aug 13, 2013 1:32 pm

I saw that FB murder pic thing. Chilling that he was so callous about it.

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Re: Random Stuff

Post by Jats on Wed Oct 09, 2013 8:09 am

...oops sorry, missed that reply Merc, and I almost forgot about you valiant few here until Kenwood's polite and perky standard letter hit my inbox to remind me... yes, funny things humans, here then, have a page of "humans" posts, I have lots of them...

It's always been a fantasy of mine to be a sex slave for 2 bears, male and female, pleasing the male when she's tired, and vice versa. Slowly sliding my lips up and down his thick shaft, tasting his pre-cum on my tongue. Once he's had enough of that, he rolls over onto his back, lifting me up as though I weighed nothing. Gently placing me on his c***....blah blah blah
"...ah if only that had been original content and not copy and pasted from the ethug top 10..." smiles Jats who loves how you can copy a block of text into a search engine and see what comes up and then raises an eyebrow at why the censorship asterix's were left in, yes very revealing "...for to post is to win is it not..." chuckles Jats now adding "...push the envelope not bash it with a stick I think is a phrase that comes to mind and those that bring original content will always be welcomed, yet still treated with contempt equally of course..." chuckles the chameleon stealing some words and slotting them in-between where they then become his own then "...yes in my opinion the Troll is one of those extravagant reliefs from the realities of life which would lose its hold upon the people if it were made moral and instructive. I regard it as quite harmless in its influence, and as an outrageous joke which no one in existence would think of regarding as an incentive to any kind of action or as a model for any kind of conduct. It is possible, I think, that one secret source of pleasure very generally derived from this performance… is the satisfaction the spectator feels in the circumstance that likenesses of men and women can be so knocked about, without any pain or suffering..." ends Jats thinking dickens was quite right and knew his audience and it's likes so well then, yes 'what the public wants the public gets' grins the chameleon as Jats finally puts on his boots and goes out to mingle amongst the humans again


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Re: Random Stuff

Post by Jats on Wed Oct 09, 2013 8:58 am

...just chatting to another madman elsewhere...

"...one more then, but keep em coming flea and it is to be expected though for that's how humans have been taught in the decadent west, to discard, throw away though some are learning, for what's coming next..." smiles Jats rather pleased with himself having picked up an old chest for a steal while sat on his arse here and then turns to the missus and asks 'does it worry you that one of my favourite tv shows is about a serial killer' while humming the theme tune 'dum de dum de dum', 'does it worry you that I am thinking about cutting up a dead mans body and placing it in that trunk' she replies delightfully with her writers cutting way "...for yes it's time for writers to become anonymous then, to slip into the shadows once more and sharpen their pens, and what better place to hide than in the bawdy taverns of forumland, blending in being one of them, for that's where the truth of the mob lies, I usually find..." bows Jats off to lose himself in another world altogether now, the download done, though always taking notes, along this journey now


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Re: Random Stuff

Post by Jats on Wed Oct 09, 2013 9:06 am

...from elsewhere, where they improved the forum and lost a lot of stuff in the process...

"...so, has anyone ever simply asked what this plan is then for the new much improved forum other than just bearing witness to the growing outcome here where of course I will keep you company along the way on this emotional journey..." promises Jats nodding "...though it's understandable to be upset when one has posted so much of oneself only to find suddenly it is all gone, just a fading memory lost in the archives along with xxxxx's history stuff where one has to essentially start all over, until it's hardly worth the effort, specially if nothing of you was really worth saving while wasting all that time then ..." chuckles Jats who has just warned the missus once again to 'leave the fucking junk draw alone BITCH' and still bristling at the thought of losing all that good stuff in there that will come in handy one day where Jats just knows he will end up with a shed in the end hiding everything from her OCD "...no change is inevitable, and as I have said before forums come and go where if you see forumland as just one big forum then you have nothing to fear other than being the last poster left standing, as eventually all there will be is millions of forums with only mods on them and no one to mod then as humans do what humans do then..." where the chameleon will just shrug and say 'I told you so' again



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Re: Random Stuff

Post by Jats on Wed Oct 09, 2013 9:11 am

...from this years glorious summer...

We truly live in sad times and the only thing masking the reality of it is the internet
"...interesting indeed..." slurs Jats still recovering gently from too much cider and preparing to start all over again later as the festival draws to a close this evening where everyone has been happy in the shire, singing and dancing, and forgetting their daily strife, as the chameleon nicks that quote for posterity then now "...though of course I see differently walking amongst the humans where for all their designer clothes, sunglasses, and wellies, the cracks are showing from these wannabe wealthies, you can see it on their faces behind the fake smiles and jolly banter where 'house prices' are barely mentioned these days replaced by 'god help us when they put the interest rates above 1%' with average pay falling by 5% year after year now where eventually you are right in this feeling 'that it's just not worth it', the daily grind on the wheel that eventually goes nowhere and your life has just flashed past your eyes in a grey montage of work, pay, work, pay until you die, where the wife and kids can cash in too on your carcass, console herself with a new husband after sleeping around to recapture her youth in the battle with her fading looks who even the kids will come to accept with time, though they will remember you always of course, from the digital photographs and for what kind of Dad you were... though whatever they remember will they remember that at least you tried before you died, said something, protested perhaps, in some kind of small way, or at least had evolved to become self aware of the species one was supposed to belong too, even of it is one of the few on the planet not to act like such, under its current subjucation, no at least they can say 'he tried for us' ..." Jats concludes coming back in from the garden with shades on and ready to go back amongst the humans and listen to some live Bob Marley and be inspired all over again perhaps before returning a little drunk and collapsing into a laughing heap with the missus, or something, where Jats will observe once again that the happiest people always seem to be the traders at these events, living out of vans, selling their crafts and wares with a head start on all of us, even if the apocalypse comes after this end of empires that we are going through now "...and so..." Jats adds conspiritously, hushing his voice to those listening for secrets like this "...oh no, that's where you and I disagree then, for I'll say it again, the military has given us the most frightening weapon of all, by mistake, so I say use it then, in between arseing about, before they take that back from you too along with all your other rights..."



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Re: Random Stuff

Post by Jats on Wed Oct 09, 2013 9:17 am

...just teasing the trolls elsewhere with flea...

...so how's it going do you think, uh, have we ranted and raved in retaliation in a big massive meltdown from your niggling and poking and irreverent posting yet...uhm no, funny that uh, or have we been disgusted shocked appalled or spewed Christian morals in defence of any argument, etcetera, etcetera, etcetera, or have we just carried on tweaking our posts, getting them right for those that choose to read them, or not..." chuckles Jats shaking his head in the cool of the little cottage by the canal that is baked in sunshine for the tenth day in a row now "...you can't win you know, give up humans for this is not chaos you are causing, as you think, as clearly you have no idea what real chaos is yet..." laughs the chameleon waving to the goblin in Geneva


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Re: Random Stuff

Post by Jats on Wed Oct 09, 2013 9:20 am

...from the "how much money is in your checking account" thread elsewhere...

"...and what happens when suddenly the ATM's stop working..." sniffs Jats at the beginning of this familiar thread, seeing it begin, the posturing and posing, little peackocks peackocking "...and when whatever money you have on paper is no longer yours cus if it's in any kind of bank of sorts then it's theirs to do what they want with when the time comes, when it suits them, yes what then..." ponders Jats sipping his tea in the shire where the hail comes down now on the coldest May since blah blah blah again where the weathermen won't tell you the cumulation of the daily data that they deliver is telling us the Ice age has already begun, two years in at least by my reckoning, no it's just up to the humans to spot the signs then if it's not too late already "...yes what will it matter then when the banks just freeze it and then take what they will, where for sure there will immediately be several threads appearing saying 'how much gold you got?' I reckon, and any smugs left will jump in to rub it in until the bullion act appears of course, leaping back out of history to remind even them that they should have paid attention, for you see none of you has real money here, not one of you, for if you had real money you wouldn't be here to begin with and you can continue to delude your self if you wish, but no not I, no I'll just come back and say I told you so, again, even from the grave then now, if I have to then..."


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Re: Random Stuff

Post by Jats on Sun Oct 13, 2013 9:07 pm

...business as usual...

"...boy what a weekend, watching the glorious pigskin games, eating, drinking, shitting, farting, fucking and merrily accomplishing nothing much here in the shire, where the weather was lovely, warm and sunny, a last farewell to summer before the fall and other than putting a tarp up as a sun/shower canopy I've managed quite successfully to do fuck all then..." smiles Jats returning from the gentle clutches of daily life for a while "...and if you looked at forumland you would think nothing was happening either, no big news today, despite the bullshit churned out by ourdermedia, yet all the little clues are there for all to see as more little I've lost my job threads appear day by day, week by week, more working multiple dead end part time jobs admitted to in the real talk sections to pay the bills and loans, and more accepting zero hours contracts as the only alternative to starvation..." declares Jats munching on a sandwich now "...and it's growing world wide, seeing as the benefits system here is moving more towards the American model and with the likes of Greece and Spain cutting all unemployment benefits completely and so Europe is bubbling under with a sea of under twenty fives all trained up virtually and ready to go into the armies, seeing as there is no fight left in them now, though if only we could have stopped it all somehow while sitting on our arses..." and then Jats comes up with a cunning plan "...but if women got conscripted too in this new national service proposal, as they should, equal rights and all that, then that should put a stop to such silly nonsense I bet you then..." sniggers the chameleon wiping the marker pen from his hands with no shame now

http://services.parliament.uk/bills/2013-14/nationalservice.html

http://www.change.org/en-GB/petitions/uk-government-stop-the-national-service-bill-2013-14



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Re: Random Stuff

Post by Jats on Fri Jan 15, 2016 1:19 pm

"...crikey has it been that long..." chuckles Jats raising the eyebrows at the last post date here being 2013 "...my apologies then seeing as I had forgotten about you lot, though not that I haven't been posting elsewhere of course with a couple of random stuffs having 100,000+, and 75,000+ views now, plus several more liivewriters wakening from the shadows because of it..." reports Jats from the soggy shire now "...where you have missed so much, tales of love and Tipi's mainly, along with the boys having grown into young men now, but you can catch up if you like as I'll polish some reposts for you while continuing the boring editing process where you can keep me company, or not, take what you will as always, in-between writing your novels and your quaint blogging..." smiles Jats seeing the rain coming down again that Jats is thoroughly sick of now, though knowing full well that he will continue stoically onwards and adding "...so happy new years then, hope you are all well and have been writing your little hearts out..."


xxx/210/8106


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Re: Random Stuff

Post by Jats on Fri Jan 15, 2016 2:21 pm

...a repost then...

BigDadie, post: 14066382, member: 74 wrote:random mayhem jats? you? :lol: that I would love to be a part of.

and for the record, I have read every single post itt. some more than once. :delight:

Jats re-stokes the fire in the little cottage by the canal as the green bay packers trot out in front of him on the big monitor to the right while his words appear to the left on the the little acer purring away quietly and so Jats pours another Jim Beam to keep himself company letting the strong clutches of dailylife slip away for a moment with the demanding, but wonderful missus having an early appointment and who is fast asleep cuddling hot water bottles now "...I knew that already from your replies and have you noticed how some change before your very eyes, and yes  it's nice to reminisce, to look back at things with a different eye... oh and I got that tipi I mentioned by the way, where I am just acquiring the poles to be made from bamboo having already made the pegs from ash, and the pins from willow... yes it's gonna be quite an adventure next year starting with a trip to France, well, that's the plan anyway..." chuckles Jats hanging on tightly as the ride continues and seeing the quarter back is knocked out cold already and so switches screens back to the slot effortlessly while they carry him off for repairs "...not that I will be posting any pics before you ask..." chuckles the chameleon "...as that's only what real people do now isn't it, facetwitting and blogging their every move, as if dailylife is so tediously boring it has to be magnified, and photo-shopped to paint over those cracks to try to stop the demons peeking through and bouncing back in their faces where all you have to do is sit back and enjoy the ride as it happens then, for pictures are only clues in the end..." smiles Jats as the gladiators resume on the big screen and lure him away from reality again


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Re: Random Stuff

Post by Jats on Sat Jan 16, 2016 4:36 am

...morning slot, what a beautiful day... a new one for here first then...

Jats wakes before the sun with the cold dark night still clinging "...ah you ghosts trying to haunt me again..." Jats chuckles meekly at the disturbing dream that woke him far too early while rustling up a hot cuppa now, and then crawling back under the duvet for a bit, being not quite ready yet to start the day of digging ahead in the cold hard ground waiting outside "...though I was pleased to see that true to form even in my dream I laughed in their cruel faces that all then fell by not giving them the reaction they were expecting, so just my sub conscious reminding me to carry on laughing then, for that's what we do us brits, that's our difference, smiling determination..." Jats yawns thinking of bacon and eggs and searching for clues as to what triggered this one then, retracing last nights events and concluding "...yes what a different film The Road would have been had a brit starred in it instead of Vigo Mortensen... perhaps the sun would have shone briefly in the constant gloom..." deduces Jats smiling at the light peaking through the trees now, a beautiful icy sunrise, and reminding Jats to go pick up the boy later, and to pick up his drugs on the way


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Re: Random Stuff

Post by Jats on Mon Jan 18, 2016 7:38 am

...a repost from a couple of years ago, the germ of an idea...

"...yes I definitely want a tipi..." declares Jats up late by the dying log burner in the little cottage by the canal after doing some more research and talking to the slot now, and no one in particular then "...a proper one mind, a Sioux design perhaps with smoke flaps, pins and poles, fully lined to provide a nice up draught so you can have a real fire inside and stay nice and warm all year round..." continues Jats clearly still adjusting to daily life after the recent marvellous camping holidays that reminded Jats of what it was like to be free, and connected to the earth  "...fascinating, and such ingenious designs where you could live in one permanently if need be which is a tantalising thought... yes those old injuns had a few tricks up their sleeves, very clever buggers indeed where I particularly liked number 25 on the tipi etiquette list that I have just found..." smiles Jats and laughing at the exorbitant prices for new tipi's especially having worked out how to make one himself now in the process, the bleeding lot for a few hundred bucks "...yes what an adventure this could be then, where I'll keep you posted then..." smiles Jats knowing full well it's not going to be all plain sailing of course



Tipi Etiquette


  1. If the door is open, a friend may enter the tipi directly.  But if it is closed, he should announce his presence and wait for the owner to invite him to come in.
  2. A male enters to the right and waits for the host to invite him to sit to the left of the owner at the rear. Be hospitable.
  3. Always assume your guest is tired, cold, and hungry.
  4. Always give your guest the place of honor in the lodge and at the feast, and serve him in reasonable ways.
  5. Invited guests are expected to bring their own bowls and spoons.
  6. Never sit while your guests stand.
  7. Woman never sit cross-legged like men. They can sit on their heels or with their legs to one side.
  8. If your guests refuses certain foods, say nothing.  He may be under vow.
  9. Protect your guest as one of the family.
  10. Do not trouble your guest with many questions about himself.  He will tell you what he wants to know.
  11. In another man's lodge, follow his customs-not your own.
  12. Never worry your host with your troubles.
  13. Always repay calls of courtesy. Do not delay.
  14. Give your host a little present upon leaving.  Little presents are little courtesies and never offend.
  15. Say "thank you" for every gift, however small.
  16. Compliment, even if you strain the facts to do so.
  17. Never walk between persons talking.
  18. Never interrupt persons talking.
  19. Always give place to your seniors in entering or leaving the lodge, or anywhere.
  20. Never sit while your seniors stand.
  21. Never force your conversations on anyone.
  22. Speak softly, especially before your elders, or in the presence of strangers.
  23. Never come between anyone and the fire.
  24. Do not stare at strangers. Drop your eyes if they stare hard at you; above all for women.
  25. The woman of the lodge are the keepers of the fire, but the men should help with the heavier sticks.
  26. Be kind
  27. Show respect to all men and women, but grovel to none.
  28. Let silence be your motto, until duty bids you to speak.
  29. Thank the Great Spirit for every meal.



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Re: Random Stuff

Post by Jats on Sun Oct 30, 2016 9:02 pm

"...oh my, I declare the general discussion forum dead then I see..." chuckles jats returning to peek and seeing nothing for months and months "...and I'm pretty sure there is a repost somewhere in my random stuff here having called it, for the writing was on the wall so to speak as forums come and go with all those carefully crafted posts wasted now then, gone forever, where mine have been read hundreds of thousands of times while not even trying, as well as living a best selling novel in the process if I just had the time to write it of course, though I have all my notes... so it seems I win after all then, and so a last post then to the writers here..." smiles jats toddling off to boldly go again


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Re: Random Stuff

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