A Kobold in Forumland

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A Kobold in Forumland

Post by Slinky_Bass on Fri Oct 08, 2010 8:12 pm

Before the tale begins, I'd like to thank Fleamailman/Goblin for introducing me to the concept of Livewriting. To be honest, I'm still not entirely sure what Livewriting entails, other than it is unplanned, freely accessible in mediums such as fora and filtered through an unusual viewpoint to distinguish it from regular blogs or posts. Comments are most welcome as others thoughts on the unfolding tale might have an unexpected impact!

P.S. My apologies, but for the sake of continuity, the first two posts shall be re-posts from Goblin's "Last Post" thread.



Last edited by Slinky_Bass on Fri Oct 08, 2010 9:15 pm; edited 2 times in total (Reason for editing : the plural of forum is fora!)

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Re: A Kobold in Forumland

Post by Slinky_Bass on Fri Oct 08, 2010 8:13 pm

Kobold was lost. She couldn't remember how it had happened, but the warmth and comfort of her home warren was long gone. She wandered aimlessly down dark, silent, and very much deserted tunnels, looking for some familiar sign. Kobold told herself with every unanswered call, and empty warren, that things were still okay. There had to be someone, somewhere who could direct her home. And so, with only sounds of the odd shifting root or scratching beetle to keep her company (and fed), she weaved her way deeper into unknown territory.

How long she wandered for she couldn't say. Moments stretched into ages and the ages became one, continuous blackness. Walk, sleep, wake, eat. Scratch your dropping into the ground and carry on walking. She was so used to her routine in the dark she almost didn't register the talking. At first she thought she was talking out loud, instead of in her head, as she was wont to do when the walk seemed especially long and lonesome. It took a while to realise the words she was hearing were different to the ones she thought. Someone was talking! All to himself, about all sorts of funny things. Kobold hunched in the blackness and listened. The voice squeaked on and on, about things she's never heard of. Writers and readers, pulling and pushing, happiness, sadness, winning and losing. It washed over her. In a way, it was like the roots creaking and the beetles scratching. All that noise lost in the darkness, with no one to hear or remember what was said. The thought made her sad, and then a little angry. Who was this voice to disturb her silence and upset her?

There were many tunnels in this part of the underground, and the voice bounced and echoed from all over, but after a while, Kobold thought she found the source. One little offshoot had a strange smell about it, the living smell of a large creature, perhaps as big as herself! She sneaked into the roughly-hewn shaft, as quiet as her clawed feet would allow and crept through the twists and turns towards the ever rambling voice. At some point she noticed a faint white glow, which grew brighter the closer she crept. She squinted, blinked back the tears and carried on. She had to. Perhaps this voice, that talked about so many things, knew the way back home?

She came to the entrance of an unkempt warren and peered into the painful brightness. Piles of droppings, debris and half eaten beetles littered the floor, in the center of which, sat a goblin, silhouetted by a square of bright white. Kobold shut her eyes and covered them with her hands. So bright it was blinding! She cleared her throat, reluctant to break the flow of words. Goblin continued talking. Not loud enough...She cleared her throat once more.

"Hello...? My name is Kobold," she said, as she squinted through a gap in her fingers. "Who are you?"

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Re: A Kobold in Forumland

Post by Slinky_Bass on Fri Oct 08, 2010 8:17 pm

The goblin barely missed a beat after Kobold's plaintive question, and she stood there, awed and confused as the torrent of words resumed. He was still hunched over that horrible white thing, he seemed to be talking to it. Kobold had heard stories, from the elders in her clan, of magic artefacts, long forgotten under the mountains in which they lived. "That must be magic," she thought. For never had she seen such a light before.

She picked her way slowly around the warren, one hand brushing the rough earth walls and the other still firmly clamped over her eyes. Every now and then she would send a small carapace or bone skittering across the floor, and all the while Goblin continued talking. Kobold sneaked a few furtive peeks at Goblin and his artefact as her eyes adjusted to the light.

Maybe he's not talking, maybe it is a chant? She remembered one particularly old and shriveled elder saying that magic was everywhere, but needed activation. It could be as simple as a word of power, a chant, or an offering or sacrifice. Some bad magics would siphon off your very soul...

Kobold hoped the bright square wasn't that kind of magic, although, something about the way Goblin chanted so fervently into the light, his entire body focused and drawn over the object, made her wonder.

A slight pause in the flow of words drew her back from her thoughts and without thinking she darted a look at the Goblin. He inclined his head ever so slightly away from the bright square.

"Ah," said the Goblin, "the moment I have had been waiting for...feel free to say anything you like then, and grow by it. There is really only one way to lose this life now. Whenever you speak, you build up yourself a bit, but I'll explain about that later, meanwhile talk with me now for I do not talk against you, no I talk with you against myself..."

"Oh! You were waiting for me then? But...how did you know I was coming...I didn't mean to get lost you know!" Kobold clamped her hand back over her eyes, that impulsive look had got her eyes watering again.

Goblin resumed his chant. Kobold mulled over his words. She was glad he was happy to talk with her, but she didn't understand why he would want to talk against himself. She agreed that talking was important, especially with other people, but listening was important too.

"I knew a kobold once, I meet many creatures in my magic bright square, and accept all of them..."

"So it IS magic! What does it do? And why is it so bright? Doesn't it hurt your eyes?" In her excitement, it took her a few moments to realize he'd said he'd met others of her kind. Kobold inched her way towards the center of the warren and sank to her haunches.

"You've meet my kind before? When? Please Goblin, I'm lost. Can you help me find my kin again?"

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Re: A Kobold in Forumland

Post by Slinky_Bass on Fri Oct 08, 2010 8:21 pm

"Yes, I have met a Kobold before, but he was a he, not a she." the Goblin paused and gave Kobold a side-long look."I don't know about helping you home though, my magic square keeps me very busy you know..." The light flared and Goblin was drawn back in. Kobold noticed changes in the light, colours, and many shapes flashing across it's bright surface.

Soon she found herself staring at the screen too. And the things she saw! Such strange faces and scenes, she could hardly make sense of it all, and running along the bottom of the magic pictures flowed a writing that moved in time to Goblin's chant. Kobold's eyes watered with the strain of watching all the magic. She rubbed her eyes and worked up the courage to interrupt the Goblin again.

"Goblin, I know you're busy, but maybe you could ask the magic square the way back home?"

Goblin sighed and turned, "Look Kobold, I don't mean to be rude, but there are hundreds of creatures waiting for my post! The world of Forumland is a fast paced one, I can't be away for too long or it will pass me by completely, and my loyal following will forget the persistent Goblin, who braved the inhospitable fora to bring them his posts."

"Well I can help you then! I'll help you deliver all your posts to the creatures of Forumland and in return you can help me find my way home." Kobold was quite pleased with her suggestion. She wasn't sure what the strange Goblin meant about posts and the fickle nature of Forumland, she was always willing to help. And besides, the Goblin, sitting all on his own with his screen and his magic, seemed almost as lost as she did, although she wasn't going to admit any such thing to him. They had only just met after all, and her parents had raised her to be a polite Kobold. Always clean your claws before a meal, keep your fur flea free, don't leave your elders behind when ambushed by a troll and never eat those from rival clans. You never know when you'll need an alliance against those nasty Gnolls.

The warren was silent for three whole heartbeats as Goblin considered Kobold's proposal. At last he said "Very well, I will meet you half way then, but lets be careful not to be seen as companions, for two reasons, one, that those creatures in Forumland certainly make assumptions of you, and two, they will not read my post if you influence it too much."

And with that, Goblin picked up his magic square and took a few tentative steps towards the exit. It seems he did not do too much walking, for his legs wobbled a little with each step.

"Thank you Goblin! Thank you, you won't regret this, I promise. And when we find my home again I'll make sure my whole clan throws a big feast. And you will be our guest of honor."

Goblin had resumed his chant to the bright square now carried in his skinny arms. But the slight twitch of a pointy ear told Kobold he had heard her.


Last edited by Slinky_Bass on Fri Oct 08, 2010 8:24 pm; edited 1 time in total (Reason for editing : Typos!)

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Re: A Kobold in Forumland

Post by Slinky_Bass on Mon Oct 11, 2010 7:26 pm

And so the unlikely pair made their way through the web of tunnels Kobold once wandered alone. Although this time the narrow paths were brightly lit by Goblin's magic artefact; the strange square that contained the place he called Forumland. The dark, lonesome tunnels were transformed by the illumination, and as they walked, the magic square painted fantastic pictures on the surfaces, in time to Goblin’s steady chant.

Despite her concerns over the dark lures of magic, Kobold found herself drawn into Forumland and soon began helping Goblin deliver his posts. She learned the rule of twelve, which expounded the virtues of posts twelve lines in length, in order to keep creatures reading. And also the rule of distinctiveness, which told of the value of a simple yet distinctive post style, that helped distinguish ones posts from the rest of the voices clamouring within Forumland.

Kobold complied as best she could, but the rule of twelve was tough. She was not afraid of the thing Goblin referred to as Wall-o-text. In fact, once she became accustomed to the many words of the square, she wanted to read all of them. Words were rare in Kobold’s home warren, and she treasured them almost as much as those shiny green bugs that tasted like chicken.

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Re: A Kobold in Forumland

Post by Slinky_Bass on Sun Oct 17, 2010 6:59 pm

As they walked, the magic square painted their way, so that the rough earth walls disappeared and were replaced by bright and strange pictures that shone from its surface. The long tunnel they traversed became an avenue of trees, filtering a golden light that sank in the west. Goblin said the trees were known as Oak, and the path that they walked was known as the Company Gardens.

Kobold had never seen such beautiful things, the only plant life she was familiar with being various types of fungus and tubers. So while Goblin continued his chant, albeit in a somewhat hushed manner, Kobold stared all about her, as the full, green Oaks rustled in the dying golden light.

A snatch of song drew her from her reverie, song very different to that of Goblin's chant. And as she peered down the avenue in search of the source, she caught a glimpse of deep orange along the path between the trees. Without a thought she ran off, all the while the mysterious song danced up towards her, leading her on.

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Re: A Kobold in Forumland

Post by Slinky_Bass on Mon Oct 18, 2010 1:49 pm

Trees blurred as she ran and before Kobold could slow to a halt, the avenue ended and she fell down a small flight of stairs into a vast cavern. As she struggled to her feet, a circle of deep orange , high above her, caught her eye.

Closer now, she saw that it was not only orange shining from the circle, but a multitude of colour fragments, red, green, blue and purple, worked together into the figure of a man. As her eyes adjusted to the dark of the cavern, she noted that there were other coloured pictures, of solemn faced men and a woman clothed in blue.

All the while the song came to her, a song made from many voices. They sounded as though from far away, and yet they rang clear and sweet in the vastness, sustained by a great vibrating sound that piped under and over the sung words.

Kobold made her way to the round picture ahead, passing through rows of wooden benches and worked stone pillars on either side. As she drew nearer she saw two great wooden stands, intricately carved with twirls and points. The ebony stands gleamed in the soft light, and she gently traced her fingers over the smooth, dark surface.

And as she moved from one carving to the other, the whites of two eyes followed her in the darkness from the stand she stood across.

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Re: A Kobold in Forumland

Post by Slinky_Bass on Thu Oct 21, 2010 9:14 am

As if sensing observation, Kobold drew to a halt before the center of the stand and sniffed deeply. Through ages of polish, burnt candles and cold stone Kobold knew the smell of the living, the smell of a man, almost directly in front of her. It was then she saw the eyes, stark white against the rich ebony of his face and the dark polished wood.

"You are a monster, a beast of the mountains. What do you do here in the house of God?" the man said. He stood then and Kobold cringed back from the dark, tall figure resplendent in his crimson robes.

"I didn't mean to trespass! I followed the many-voiced song down the oaken path and fell down some stairs into this cavern and I was just looking at the beautiful pictures and listening to the song..."

"This is no cavern, it is a cathedral, the cathedral of St. George." The man interrupted as he stepped down from the stand and walked slowly over to Kobold. He kept both hands out, palms up, so she could see he carried no weapon and did not intend to strike.

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Re: A Kobold in Forumland

Post by fleamailman on Thu Oct 21, 2010 10:43 am

("....ah kobold I just love this thread, big apologies for not seeing it sooner, but now I am on the ball here, and feeding on it, looking good, you write so well too..." mentioned the goblin, adding "...expect people to jump in like this, because unlike a book, you've got instant feedback, and I for one say "bravo" now...", in fact, the goblin understood that a livewriter also had to learn a bit about the dark arts, since hecklers were never far away, "...but on with the show now, take me away kobold, I'll follow this silently, without comment further, just wanting more...")

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Re: A Kobold in Forumland

Post by fleamailman on Tue Oct 26, 2010 6:17 am

“...well slinky you're amazingly talented...” started the goblin, thinking kobold only as some lose association here, perhaps as a livewriter trick for being remembered then, continuing “...first off, being a thread, and not a blog, having someone unexpectedly turn up here is the norm, no, anticipate it even, welcome it perhaps, use it anyway, remember in part you're feeding off their replies too, where not all replies are hostile, any more than they are all complimentary either, so one learns how to give as good, or as bad, as one gets...”, so the thread was “kobold on stage” then, where some timely “swot the bot” was just as indispensable as encouragement was, adding “...also, length is important, for too long and readers won't read it, too short and you won't do your work justice, in that most readers noted lengh and username first, where their hearts simply sank at long posts...”, in fact, the picture both helped the goblin retrieve his posts in a hurry and let the reader know if he had seen it before, concluding "...if I didn't care and think you had what it takes to become noted for this, I wouldn't post here, where that bookworld it's all backbitting, but my being anonymous means that we're on your side now..."


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Re: A Kobold in Forumland

Post by Slinky_Bass on Thu Oct 28, 2010 4:59 pm

fleamailman wrote:“...well slinky you're amazingly talented...” started the goblin, thinking kobold only as some lose association here, perhaps as a livewriter trick for being remembered then, continuing
(Thank you Goblin. Please note that I accept criticism as gracefully as I do compliments. Both are welcome. As far as my Livwriting concept goes, I aim to make more of an effort at posting in general (with a view to keeping the posts I'm particularly proud of) while also telling the story of Kobold in a more traditional manner. Well, that's the idea anyway, I'll see how things go.)

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Re: A Kobold in Forumland

Post by Slinky_Bass on Thu Oct 28, 2010 8:36 pm

*After travelling for some time with the lonesome, chanting Goblin, Kobold finds herself transported into the strange realm of Forumland, and is led down a tree-lined path, following strains of a many-voiced song. She stumbles into a vast cavern, full of beautiful sights and sounds. The cavern is also home to a man, a dark, impressive and finely robed man, who tells her quite sharply that it is no cavern she roams, but the house of God.*

"Ssaint George's catherdal?" Kobold stammered, edging away from the man as he circled toward her. "I thought you said it was God's house?"

"Yes it is God's house, all churches and cathedrals are..." He frowned a little. "But we give them names, after the paragons of the faith. In this case, the cathedral bears the name of St. George, he who slayed the evil dragon."

And at that Kobold grew wary. For her clan, indeed all Kobold clans, revered dragons. It was the dragons which used their own blood and magic to create the race of Kobolds. Some were even gifted with a smattering of innate magic power, as a result of the magical blood mixed in their veins. As much as the rich song of the cathedral appealed to her, and the beauty of the bright, mosaic pictures enchanted her, she realized this cathedral might be a dangerous place for a Kobold, especially since its namesake was famed for slaying a dragon.

"Well, mister, God, Saint George... I better go. I'm really sorry for trespassing," Kobold backed away as she spoke and kept her gaze fixed on the crimson robed man.

"It's a very nice place, this cathedral of yours, lovely music and pictures, but not a place for a Kobold like me." She rattled on, retreating from the fine wooden choir stands, the carved stone pillars and the wooden benches, until she ran out of things to say. At which point the man advanced bearing a cross-shaped weapon in his right hand. He moved quickly for such a large creature, the subtle hiss of his silk robes the only sound now in the silent cathedral.

Kobold's nerve left her. She abandoned her careful retreat, ran to the stairs and up and out into the avenue, which was now still and grey with twilight. She heard the faint cries of the man, something about baptism, bibles and rebirth. The voice came no nearer, though, and bit by bit her breath returned and wits returned as the irrational fear she felt in the cathedral receded. Some paces away, nestled between the gnarled roots of two old oaks, sat the Goblin with his bright square. Kobold made her way over and looked forlornly at the magic square.

"Forumland can be a dangerous place sometimes Kobold," he said. "Although the danger is not always obvious." He produced a plain silver carafe from under an arm and unscrewed the lid, into which he poured a dark, aromatic drink.

"Here, try some. It's quite strong at first taste, but it'll give you the energy to keep on posting an adventuring through all these strange and inhospitable fora," he emphasized his point with a long sip and an appreciative sigh.

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Re: A Kobold in Forumland

Post by Jats on Fri Nov 05, 2010 12:06 am

"...another subscriber here then, and there will be many, though not all will play along, cheers will become jeers and you will have to stay strong, yet it will all become worth it in those moments of inspiration and joy of a duet or band with the audience singing along..." as Jats picks up his guitar now...

"...as YouTube kick started the music industry back into life, releasing it from the stranglehold of the few and back to the many, are we now at the start of a renaissance for books too, for there has been no YouTube for them, but the technology is coming with i-things whizzing off the shelves..." splicing two old posts together the chameleon demonstrates "...and the beauty of live writing is that it can change on every edit, before every re-post, getting better and better, honed to perfection, especially those annoying spelling mistakes, whereas the book and the blog is set in stone, only the sequel, or annoying prequel allowed, with live writing whereas, you can ebb and flow, acquiring a bigger audience, a following, wherever you go, going forwards, breaking free, not trapped by convention, but not a franchise tho, more like musicians jamming using the same scales and notes in a pattern of unpredictability and impressions of self then..."


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Re: A Kobold in Forumland

Post by Slinky_Bass on Fri Nov 05, 2010 11:41 pm

(Glad to have you listening JATS! I'm trying something a little different here from the current Livewriting M.O., but seeing as I want forumers responses interspersed with my own posts, I need to rethink my posts so that they can stand alone and hang together as part of a larger narrative. So for those of you reading, please be patient, I still have some experimenting to do...)

Beverage of Choice

Kobold eyed the cup Goblin held out to her. It smelled interesting, and strong, so she took a small sip, savouring it before swallowing. "It's quite potent, but good," admitted Kobold, finishing her cup. "It reminds me of a drink they prepare back home, but that's more watery and herbal. We call it tisane."

"Well, Kobold, the flavour of coffee, for that is what this rich, dark drink is called, is certainly delicious. But its benefits far outweigh the taste," said the Goblin, pouring himself another cup and draining it with equal speed. "When consumed, this beverage bestows a surplus of energy and clarity to the drinker, allowing one to stay awake for days at a time."

Kobold nodded her head, but was skeptical. Either this coffee was magic or it was a drug, because every living thing needed to sleep, and she would hate to think how clouded her mind would be should she not be allowed to dream away those thoughts that plagued her during her waking life. After a few minutes of banter, and more coffee, Kobold did indeed feel a difference, an energy rising withing her. This was a good thing, since their last meal was two days ago, and the pair was famished by all accounts. The coffee would have to do in the meantime, and Kobold tried not to think too hard about where Goblin stored it, or how the silver carafe was always full.

So the unlikely companions, fueled up on coffee and stomachs grumbling, delivered their posts across Forumland. All was well, if a bit weak and jittery, until they caught scent of a Trolls lair and the undeniable aroma of food wafting from the bone-littered cave mouth.

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Re: A Kobold in Forumland

Post by Jats on Mon Nov 08, 2010 12:48 pm

Glad to have you listening JATS! I'm trying something a little different here from the current Livewriting M.O.

"...do as you wish, take from it what you will, I for one will be listening now, though speak up if you venture elsewhere and need any help with Trolls then..."

"...date, make friends, give me a break, they don't want you to do that, and meet someone, not a chance, you will pay attention to them, forsake any illusions of pleasant fraternity, it's not going to happen, not now they have found you, their true love, their one desire, and they will consume, beguile, cajole, and horns-waggle you, with every word you capitulate, have you perplexed, befuddled, anaesthetised into a slumbering, recurring purgatory, as they draggle and drabble, sucking you down with them ..."


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Re: A Kobold in Forumland

Post by Slinky_Bass on Thu Nov 11, 2010 9:26 pm

Beverage of Choice part II

Four complete rib cages, twelve discernible skulls and a jagged mess of splintered, white bones paved the way to the yawning cave mouth. Kobold and Goblin watched from a dark alcove furthest from the entrance, sniffing eagerly at the delicious smells wafting from the cave. The bone clearing was well lit, and surprisingly free of gore. For despite all the remains, there was not a whiff of rot, and the bone gleamed white in the torchlight, given off by a multitude of tiny torches along the walls and ceiling.

Kobolds stomach growled, the sound clearly audible in the otherwise still cavern. Goblin jerked an elbow into her side. "Shhhhht," he hissed, his eyes wide with fear and coffee. She twitched an eyebrow in his direction and suppressed a scowl.

"It's very quiet," she whispered, "Trolls are noisy brutes...I think it's safe to explore..."

"Are you crazy, it could be a trap!" Goblins voice started to rise but he checked himself.

"Goblin, it's been five days now. I can't drink any more coffee or my heart will leap out of my chest and run off and live a life of its own. I'm dead on my feet. I've already passed out twice and I just don't have the strength to explore Forumland anymore. I need something to eat...I need to sleep..."

"Quiet!" He demanded, louder than intended. And at that they crouched in the alcove, listening, waiting, until both their caffeine abused hearts and minds stopped racing. The rich aroma of food continued to taunt her, though, and Kobold could stand it no longer. Without another word she stalked off towards the trolls lair, ignoring Goblin's frantic hisses.

The carpet of bone was surprisingly dense, but Kobolds are famed for their dexterity and stealth, and she made it past with no incident. One curious thing that caught her attention was a flash of shiny, bright red, scuttling into a nearby skull. "Some sort of carrion beetle no doubt," she mused to herself. But no carrion beetle she'd ever seen was red, everyone knew they were brown. But Kobold gave it no more thought once she got to the entrance. The smell of food was so close she could taste it. She crept into the lair as silently as her little padded feet allowed, keeping close to the walls. The Trolls cave was a simple affair and after following the crudely dug entrance for twenty paces, the passage split into three. To Kobolds food-starved senses, the choice was easy one; the middle fork would lead to the feast. Another twenty paces or so and she could hear the sounds of meat spitting over a fire, and what sounded like a jolly little voice singing about tea, cake, spit-roast and ~"the life of a thief is a life for me"~

Kobold slowed, hesitant now at the definite sign of life, but it wasn't the voice of a troll, or she'd run for sure. No, the voice was way to soft, refined even, and everyone knew trolls didn't sing. You were lucky if you got more than a grunted "STFU", "WTF" or "I EET NOOBS!!1!" out of them before they bashed your brains out. So she crept to the end of the passage, poked her head through the rough archway and was greeted by the startling sight of what appeared to be a young troll, singing with abandon as he danced around the roast. He held a delicate looking cup in one hand and a plate piled high with cake in the other.

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Re: A Kobold in Forumland

Post by fleamailman on Sat Nov 13, 2010 10:35 am

("...it reads well, and I am following this in earnest now..." went the goblin letting the image unfold with his mind, each time, adding "...lead me on then...")

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Re: A Kobold in Forumland

Post by fleamailman on Tue Nov 16, 2010 5:43 pm

"...curious, I joined that other forum then..." went the goblin who would run silent there then till very much later, explaining "'...so you jumped into the deep end, and you swim well too, and yet you are probably feeling a sense of elation and involvement, not regardless of outcome of course, that a blog would never have given you in its set sure ways then..." adding "...I throw a rose onto your stage now, take it a away kobold..."


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Re: A Kobold in Forumland

Post by Slinky_Bass on Wed Nov 17, 2010 4:18 pm

Many Guises are Better than One

“Ah, hello, welcome you must be Kobold then,” said the troll, pausing in his dance. He was well groomed for a troll, she noted. His hair was combed and parted to the side, and he wore a pressed white shirt and dark grey pants. He set his tea and cake to the side and trotted over to Kobold, who still stood with her head poked into the cavern, staring in surprise.

“What, this?” He said, indicating himself, “Just a disguise, my dear. The real owner of this cave has always wanted a little troll of her own, you see. So you could say I’m doing her a favour by pretending to be her child and accepting all the food, gifts and lavish attention that goes with it…”

Kobold had never heard of such a thing, taking the form of another, especially a troll, and wondered at what magics he possessed.

“So, you’re not really a troll then?”

“Well, I guess there’s a bit of troll in all of us, wouldn’t you say. But as to my physiology, no, I wasn’t born a troll, I’m actually a chameleon.” He said with a mischievous smile and wink. On winking he let the disguise drop for a moment and Kobold saw the strangest creature standing before her, with eyes that looked in opposite directions and a textured skin that shifted from one colour to another.

“Earlier, you spoke as if you were expecting me,” ventured Kobold, still not quite sure of this chameleon fellow.

“Oh yeah, didn’t Goblin tell, you? We’re long time post buddies, he posted me some time back that he was travelling with a Kobold.”

Before Kobold could say anymore her stomach uttered a plaintive grumble.
Chameleon chuckled, and invited her inside his temporary home, offering her a wooden chair by the fire and a cup of what looked very much like tisane to Kobold.

“Well, eat then and be merry, friend of a friend. After all it’s on the house!” And at that he took up his cup and sipped his tea, pausing every now and then for a bite of apple tart.

Kobold wasted no time and set down to some serious eating. She polished off an entire apple tart on her own, washed down with countless cups of tea, which she found far more palatable than coffee, despite its wateriness. Chameleon turned out to be interesting company, and he whiled away the hours entertaining her with stories of his escapades in Forumland. After a while Chameleon dropped the troll guise and switched from form to form, much to the delight of Kobold, who thought her dark brown fur and plain, Kobold face quite boring compared to the exotic chameleon.


Last edited by Slinky_Bass on Wed Nov 17, 2010 5:08 pm; edited 1 time in total (Reason for editing : zapping those typos...)

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Re: A Kobold in Forumland

Post by Jats on Wed Nov 17, 2010 4:41 pm

"...well now, I see..." chuckles the chameleon "...so we are to be immortalised in the tales of your adventures in forum-land..." and smiles while taking the blade discreetly from the bouquet he is holding, and with a conjurers skill deftly slips it into his jacket pocket unseen, no need of it now it seems, as Jats bows and presents the flowers at her feet "...Bravo from me too then..."

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Re: A Kobold in Forumland

Post by Slinky_Bass on Thu Nov 18, 2010 7:52 pm

Queentrollbot Returns

“Kobold! Kobold…the…she’s here!” a breathless Goblin hissed as he ran into the den.

“Relax Goblin, I’ve got things under control…” But the Chameleon fell silent at the sight of the malformed shadow looming behind his friend.

“N0OBS IN MY CAVETHREAD!!1!” roared the troll, her bloodshot eyes travelling from one strange face to the other with all the speed of a sloth on sedatives.

“QUEENTROLLB0T EET NOOBS!” “NOOBS R DUM.LOLRAAGH.” The misbegotten creature lunged at Goblin, who stood nearest to her, but Goblins are nothing if not fast on their feet and he danced nimbly through her legs and out down the tunnel.

“Ah well, I was getting tired of this gig anyway. The old ham has been taking special hormones so she can breastfeed again…” Chameleon trailed off. “I mean free tea and food is good, but that’s just too weird for this Chameleon.” He shuddered and shook his head.

“You ever see an old troll’s boobs?”

Kobold didn’t even stop to answer. She dodged another slow, but brutal swing and ran for it.

“Never mind then. So long wench and thanks for all the tea!” taunted Chameleon, who waggled his eyes in opposite directions and stuck out his tongue. He dodged around the spit roast and grabbed one last plate of cake before running out the den. Chameleon almost knocked into Goblin on his way out. He stood at the threshold of the cave, along with Kobold.

“What’s the hold up here guys? There’s four hundred pounds of smelly, hormonal troll behind us, calling for our blood.”

“I was a trap,” whispered Kobold, and Chameleon saw them then. The white carpet of bone was transformed into a seething, bristling mass of red carrionbot beetles, mindless and desperate for their next meal.


Last edited by Slinky_Bass on Thu Nov 18, 2010 8:21 pm; edited 1 time in total

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Re: A Kobold in Forumland

Post by Slinky_Bass on Thu Nov 18, 2010 8:19 pm

Meanwhile, elsewhere in Forumland

In the peaceful town that lay beneath the benevolent gaze of Shock Totem, Kobold paused to take a bow at her loyal audience.

“Glad you’re enjoying the show, my dear followers. Stick around, I have the feeling things are going to get a little hairy.” Kobold regretted her choice of words at once, the word “hairy” summoning up images of old trolls and such. She paused to pick up the single rose and bouquet of flowers lying at her feet and inhaled. The sweet fragrance helped dispel the lingering odour of troll.

“Beautiful flowers to match an equally beautiful sentiment, thank you, gentlemen, for everything.” Kobold found some tall glasses to put the flowers in. She kept no vases on hand, for she hardly received flowers, preferring instead the longevity of potted plants over those decapitated beauties.

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Re: A Kobold in Forumland

Post by Slinky_Bass on Thu Nov 25, 2010 6:42 pm

Take the Bait

(After her valiant struggle and defeat of the relentless Headcold, our intrepid Livewriter returns with the aim of wrapping up the last instalment’s cliff-hanger.)

The trio stared forlornly at the mass of carrionbots. Despite their tiny size and mindlessness, they were deadly in numbers, and driven by the insatiable desire to feed on those who actually dared to think and express themselves. They were drawn to the likes of Goblin and Chameleon like zombies to a brain.

“I’m thinking maybe troll boob wasn't too bad an option at this point,” said Chameleon with a sigh.

Behind them the sounds of lumbering troll and barely intelligible TR0LLspeak drew closer. Kobold caught herself thinking of the stalwart Muskrat, and dear Goodwitch, who would no doubt find some way to overcome these perils. She shook her head and rubbed her eyes, “No, that was elsewhere, this is here and somehow I am in both places at once, always on death’s door or facing some peril it seems.”

A loud thump, followed by the scuttle and hiss of the carrionbots, roused all three from their last minute thoughts. The red beetles fought viciously amongst themselves for space on an “L” shaped lump that sat askance on the bone carpet.

Another thump, to their right this time and they saw what appeared to be a dismembered foot, complete with leg up to the knee, arc out from the darkness across the cavern. The rotting, dismembered feet flew out with speed and surety, left, then right, then left. Always alternating and drawing further away from them. The carrionbots flocked to the trail of foot remains on either side, leaving a narrow pathway of bone down the centre.

“Quick guys, run! The red beetles are parted but not for long…” came a rough voice from the darkness. So they ran, narrowly missing a wild swing from behind from the hormonal troll.

Now the mind is a funny thing, and in the midst of running for his life, Chameleon noticed something odd sticking out from the white. He whipped out his tongue, curled it around its middle and pulled as he ran. “Perhaps here was some treasure, buried underneath the bones of the dead, maybe a magic artefact even,” that oddly clear part of Chameleon thought to himself.

They reached the safety of the opposite tunnel just in time. The carrionbots had made short work of the feet, and they massed now at the edge of the carpet, hissing and bristling with fury at the meal they had missed.
“Cunning…for a troll,” panted Goblin. He sat down and withdrew his coffee carafe from thin air and drank straight from the vessel. Chameleon sat down beside him and munched on some cake, turning over the object he had liberated in his other hand.

“Hmmm, a capital “K” is it,” he mused to himself. “I might just know who once owned this, although why he was here, and under what circumstances he lost the “K” is another story entirely.” A story Chameleon intended to find out.

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Re: A Kobold in Forumland

Post by fleamailman on Thu Nov 25, 2010 7:55 pm

("....it's reading good..." said the goblin liking it)

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Re: A Kobold in Forumland

Post by Jats on Thu Nov 25, 2010 7:57 pm

"...darn just beat me too it, as here too I am completely drawn in not sure whether I am reading it or living it then..."

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Re: A Kobold in Forumland

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